The Shema Initiative: Engaging Parents

It’s a phone conversation that every veteran youth worker has had on multiple occasions.  The players change but the story always stays the same.  I had on the other line an upset parent who had some serious concerns about their soon to be teenage child.  It was not directly said, but there was an implied undertone, a hope that I would be able to step in and do something to remedy the situation.  Now, I have to confess that my normal course of action would have been to swoop in like superman and try to fix things in an hour or two…I bet you can guess what kind of success rate I’ve had with that approach…

But instead, in a moment of uncharacteristic Godly wisdom, I took a different approach.  I asked this parent about Christian practices in the home.  During this conversation I learned that though this parent, and their spouse were actively involved in the church's children's ministries, little or nothing was being done in their home throughout the week to reinforce their family's walk with God.  I couldn’t help but think that this fact played some role in the struggles they were having with their child, and I told them so.  I think that many parents would tell the same story if asked.

1.       By explaining that the current church staff driven model is not working. We can share that the surveys show that up to half of our students will “shelve their faith” in college. We can state that the average youth in our programs will only have roughly 2 hours a week with us and that is shared with all the other students present. We can tell parents that if they 15-30 minutes a day praying and doing devotions as a family then they have just matched that amount of time, not taking into account the many hours of possible informal faith sharing parents can have with their children.

2.       By giving them practical suggestions.  Encourage parents to consistently pray and have devotional time with your children. Make sure they don't beat themselves up if it doesn't work to do it every day but tell them to commit to do it when it does work by finding a pattern.  Inform parents that it is just as important to show their children how their faith is a part of their everyday life (even if it's in small ways). Sugguest letting students catch them reading the bible, and share with their children about how they experienced God during the day and ask them to do the same.

3.       Reassure parents that this idea about children's and youth discipleship does not diminish the role that that the church’s youth group has, it makes it more effective. Plead with parents that whenever it's feasibly possible BRING THEIR CHILD TO CHURCH ACTIVITIES!!! State that you are not saying that their child can't be involved in activities that conflict with youth group night activities, but be clear that the various church activities have to be a priority, and your children have to know it's a priority.  Challenge parents that their family priorities will impact what they do with their time.

4.       Finally, identify parents who already understand and live out “the Shema initiative” and task them with helping to spread the vision to others. 

Attempting to engage parents can be a frustrating process but it is well worth the effort.  If youth workers are serious about making life long disciples than they must be serious about engaging parents into the process of discipling their children.  

Thinking Small: Effective Youth Ministry for Small Churches

Small church youth groups should be encouraged to hear that many recent youth ministry trends- highlighted by resources like Fuller Youth Institute’s Sticky Faith Initiative  and Mark Oestreicher’s book Youth Ministry 3.0- are actually quite favorable to them (intergenerational experiences, for example).  It’s time for these smaller youth ministries to reject youth ministry models that are impossible for them to create and hone in on trends that are conducive to their current situation.  Small churches can have vibrant youth ministries by:

1.      Remembering the true purpose of your church’s youth ministry.  Any student ministry “worth its salt” has planting seeds to be used by God to transform students into devout, life-long disciples of Christ as part of their mission/vision.  This is a mission that can be fulfilled regardless of the size of your ministry.  If you believe that your ministry cannot be effective in its current condition, than it won’t be!

2.      Making your youth group predictable.  It is true that creativity is an important part of student ministry but equally so is consistency and the two can coexist.  Young people crave consistency and an effective youth group will provide it.  This is especially vital when it comes to the discipline policies and basic structure of a youth meeting.  Make sure all parties involved know the process for misbehavior and make sure that all leaders follow it to the rule.  This will minimize distractions and you might find that it brings out the best in your students.  Create a basic outline for youth meetings and follow it every week.  I would suggest opening with some fellowship time and a fun activity/game.  If you have snacks at your youth group build in specific times for munching and limit students to this time.  As you move into the content have a specific flow that you stick to.  I suggest opening with the scripture.  Here’s a hint, use the scripture that your pastor is preaching on.  You can chose to prep (lesson before the sermon) or reinforce (lesson after the sermon) the sermon with your youth meeting.  Next, if at all possible reinforce the sermon with some sort of media.  You can find clips for every situation on Youtube or Vimeo (even if it is from a cheesy bible movie).  If you have a second text sandwich the media piece with the two readings.  Now create four or five open ended discussion questions for the group to explore.  Yes/no answers should be treated as if they are the black plague.  Don’t try to steer things too much you will be able to take things in the right direction with a wrap up (5 minutes or less) at the end of the night.  You may pray at other times during the night but always close the night with prayer.  Give students a few minutes to share praises and requests.  Challenge students to pray but don’t push them too hard.  

3.      Making hospitality a priority. I have a friend who is a part time youth director at a small church.  His youth group is booming.  So what’s the secret?  The vast majority of his students aren't from the church.  The days when you had to be a big fun group to attract students is all but over.  If a student knows that his or her friend will be welcomed and loved in your group no matter what than they will be willing to invite them.  If that student feels comfortable and that he or she belongs than he or she will keep coming.  In order for this to happen hospitality has to be more than an afterthought. 

If a youth ministry, no matter how small, is discipleship driven, consistent and hospitable it will not only be an effective ministry, it will also be one in the position to experience numerical growth.

Thanksgiving Post: Selfishness is Faithlessness

“That’s not fair” has become my three year old son’s favorite phrase.  He undoubtedly learned the saying from his older brother, who probably learned it from a peer.  While he learned the phrase from another, his desire to stand up for his rights was developed all by himself.  It is both comical and disheartening to watch my children fight diligently to make sure they don’t get “the short end of the stick.” 

I can’t really throw stones, can I?  My self advocacy might not be as obvious, but it is no less prevalent.  We’re all guilty of it, aren't we?  I've seen the most literal of Sola Scriptura Christians easily and quickly dismiss the example of the church of Acts in chapter 2 with a “why would I give away my stuff, I earned it!’  We are a selfish people living in a selfish world.  It might be why the majority of “givers” in our church tithe (and I use that word WAY to loosely) less than one percent. 

Why do we struggle so much with this?  Why are we so selfish?  Is it just because we are so wicked?  I propose that this is not the case (and yes, I know all about the doctrine of original sin).  We can go into the ridiculous lifestyles we live and our insane idea of what our needs are (most of which are actually wants) and we can rebuttal that our less selfish ancestors were more generous because “back in the day” able bodied workers making a living was almost a guarantee. 

And that gets to the heart of it doesn't it.  Greed is about looking out for me, because I don’t have faith (or trust) that my needs will be met otherwise.  The implications are huge; I am selfish because I don’t trust God.  My three year old son is obsessed with making sure he gets a fair shake because he thinks (in part) that he will not be taken care of otherwise.  What a crappy thing to learn and such a young age!

This is what makes the Thanksgiving holiday (and more importantly, a spirit/heart of thanksgiving) so important.  Thanksgiving helps us spend time reflecting on God's faithfulness allowing us to place our trust in Him and acknowledge His faithfulness.  If I truly trust in God and believe that He is faithful than I don’t need to fight for myself, I don’t need to be greedy, and I don’t need to worry about things “being fair.”  So during this season of Thanksgiving let us take seriously the task of helping our children and the young people of our church reflect on God’s faithfulness revealed in their past so that they can gain perspective and learn to trust in Him.

Church as Department Store

Consuming the Church...

I am seeing more and more that individuals are approaching church from a consumerist perspective.  I hear phrases like “What I need from a Church...” and “When I was Church shopping...”  Now I have heard this phrase from some amazing people.  People devoted to service and to this church.  They just don’t realize what they are doing...comparing God’s church to a pair of jeans.  Even the last few Sundays’ attendance speaks to this idea.  Pastor has been on vacation so many congregants have opted to miss church.  So then, worship is about hearing a phenomenal message from the pastor, instead of a mediocre message from that other person.  Is this what it means to be part of a Church?  Is it nothing more than a support group, or glorified country club? 

It’s my belief that these conceptions are, in reality misconceptions.  I believe that God expects something more from and for His Church and today’s scripture lesson supports that belief. 

The Church of Acts

Acts 2:42-47 is packed full with functions of the first Christian Church, but is being an ACTS 2 church as straight forward as that?  After all, many if not most American churches mimic much or all of the church functions described in this passage.  But let’s take a closer look.

Acts 2:42

·       It was a Learning Church: Christian Education – Apostles Teaching

·       It was a Church of Fellowship

·       It was a Church that broke bread together, Sharing of Meals and the Lord’s Supper

·       It was a Church of Prayer

Acts 2:43-

·       It was a reverent Church; they had a since of Awe over what God was doing. 

·       It was a Church where things happened; they witnessed miraculous signs and wonders performed by the Apostles.  Ya know, Jesus indicated on multiple occasions during his ministry on earth that the miracles he performed were due in part to the faith of the recipient.  I wonder if we could see signs and wonders today if we had more faith, and a since of Awe over what God is doing and has already done.  I wonder if we have already seen signs and wonders and have not even recognized them because we were too busy, or too quick to explain them away.

Acts 2:44&45 –

·       It was a Sharing Church.  Those who had access shared with those who were struggling to provide for themselves.  I have witnessed this and it is such an amazing thing to see

Acts 2:46 -

·       It was a worshiping Church

·       It was a happy Church

Acts 2:47-

·       It was a church of people whom others could not help liking. It is clear that the Church was visible, that those who were not a part of the church were aware of and even impacted by what the Church did.

·       The Result: The Lord worked through what the Church was doing to add new believers every day. 

It’s natural when we look at the first Christian Church to hone in on the regular public practices of the Church but in doing so we miss a lot about what this passage has to say about the Church.  As I alluded to before, there are many churches that are doing these regular public practices without the miraculous results.

For this reason, I want to begin with the result of what the Church was doing; The Lord was adding new believers daily! 

Why and how was the Lord adding to their numbers daily?

Was it because of the functions of the church?

Was it because it was learning, praying church of fellowship that broke bread together?  Was it because it was a reverent, sharing, worshiping church?

Certainly all these reasons were in part why God was moving in such a powerful way through this church but they don’t seem to guarantee the miraculous results.  There was something more going on than that.  So, I am going to focus in on one of the characteristics of the church of Acts that was not a function of the church and I believe the one characteristic that gets the least attention.  This church was a church of people whom others liked and were drawn to. 

What does that mean?  What does that look like?  Well I think it was a church of people that could not go unnoticed by the community around them because of their positive uniqueness.  It was a group of people who were living examples of the good news of Christ. 

Now we need to pause here a second, there are plenty of churches today who cannot go unnoticed, but for all the wrong reasons, right? As a result these churches are not liked, and sometimes even detested by those looking into their community from the outside.  It’s sad isn’t it, when the gospel is reduced to a scare tactic or a message of hate. 

But that is clearly not what is going on here.  Rather, living the gospel means that this group of people and the church they made up were so radically different from the culture’s status quo that the people outside of the movement couldn’t  help but notice what was going on and be drawn to it.    

There are several examples in the history of the Christian church of followers who fit this description:

Celtic Missionaries

One such group was missionaries led by St. Patrick who brought the gospel of Christ to the Celtic world in the 5^th Century A.D.  These missionaries created communities similar to monastic communities, that is communities of Christian monks.  The difference was that these communities were not for the primary purpose of deepening ones spiritual disciplines, like the communities of monks, but rather were for the primary purpose of evangelism.  These communities were formed within a village rather than in some secluded place and were constantly welcoming the surrounding village to come and witness what was going on.  The community was visible and available to the village thus making the gospel real to them.  

Wesley’s Societies

For those who have studied John Wesley and his societies you might be thinking that there are some similarities between the Celtic evangelists’ communities and Wesley’s societies, and you’d be right.  To be sure, Wesley had high demands on those who were part of his societies, but there were no initial restrictions or exclusions for those who wanted to experience and join the societies. 

Wesley was so convinced of the transforming power of experiencing the societies that he even went to far as to offer communion to non-Christians.  Wesley believed that the act of communion would be evangelistic within the setting of the societies.

The Point

It is clear from these examples that the Gospel of Jesus is spread when His church immerses itself in the unbelieving world not to assimilate but to create a sub-culture.  The Church and its congregants are called to be a counter-cultural beacon amidst the surrounding culture beckoning the world around to come and experience something different.  The Church is called to be a living example of the Good News to the community around it. 

If Christ’s church and His followers are engaged with the world around them seeking to show the community something completely different, to show them the Love of God and His good news, then the people of the world can’t help but be drawn to the church and its way of life

When I was thinking about this reflection and its concept several months ago my lovely wife said to me “that’s great Chad, but what does THAT look like?”  So, what does that look like in 2012 in our communities?

I think I have an idea what it looks like, because I’ve seen several examples of it in resent months.  I think it looks like a freshman girl, who upon learning that separation of church and state does not mean that she is unable to pray and talk about God at school, started a prayer group and bible study that takes place before school once a week at the freshman center. 

I think maybe It looks like a college student who decided to share the hope God had given him during the worse year of his life on YouTube sharing the good news of Christ in a very real way to literally thousands upon thousands of young people.  To date that video has been viewed more than 1.2 million times and has about 11,000 comments about it, not taking into account additional comments referring to it on other social media sites, like facebook, which undoubtedly must number in the thousands.   Amazing!

Perhaps it looks like a family from this church who brings the children of their neighbors or family friends to church activities with the hopes that eventually the entire family will accept the good news of Christ and become a part of this church family.

The point is that this Acts 2 vision has to start with each of us as individuals.   We must begin to see the lost people of this community as God does. 

This church as individuals and as a collective body must decide that they will engage with the world, not to be like it, but to draw it to us by being something completely different.  We must be the revelation of God and his good news the way the church of Acts was, and the way Christ was during his ministry on earth.  We must call these individuals to a new way of life!  We must show them God’s love.  Did you catch that?  The church is called to be the revelation of God to this world the way Christ was when he was on earth…Wow!  That's heavy!

How?  Well, what if a couple of congregants from this church who lived in the same neighborhood decided that they were going to show a fellow neighbor the unconditional love of God in concrete ways.  Do you think that would get their attention?  What if students from our youth ministries decided together that they would befriend a peer who has been labeled as an outcast and invite them to youth events?  Do you think that teenager might consider becoming a part of this church?  I’ve got more ideas, but I think you are starting to get the picture. 

I can tell you what it doesn't look like; it doesn't look like a group of people sitting idly by waiting for someone else to do it.  So will you make the decision today to become an active part of a body of Christ that impacts this world in a way that can’t be ignored and can’t be looked at any other way than favorably?  Are you willing to do what it takes to draw the lost into our fold on a daily basis? 

Ministry First, Youth Ministry Second

Last Thursday marked one of the most amazing days of my life. In the span of just a few hours I had two amazing encounters with young adults who were part of students ministries I have been a part of in the past. The encounter was a much needed reminder of just the lasting impact we can have on young people, even if in the moment it doesn't feel like anything "special" is happening. God is not necessarily done using us to minister to young people when they leave are programs. I'm sure we all realize this intellectually, but I think a Godly reminder was still in order for my life.

So, a college student asking questions about where God fits in the messiness that is their life and a former special needs student finding my long lost number in an old cell phone some 5 ½ years after I son him last more than made my day. There is nothing profound about this, but I need to say it, we are involved in ministry first, youth ministry second. Me we never again forget how big God is as we think about the specifics of are ministry job description.

Youth Ministry and the Great Emergence

Upon reading Phyllis Tickle's wonderful little book The Great Emergence something became quite clear to me. Long before I had ever heard the term "Emergent Christianity" I was being taught to wrestle with it through formal religious academia (the most poignant being the de-Hellenization of Chrisitianity). While I would in no way define myself as an Emergent Christian (if we must find a label, it would probably be re-traditionalist or progressive Christian) I must confess that this discovery was not at all troubling to me.

We must realize that "The Great Emergence" is a historical fact (though fluid) and that it is in part, a product of a cultural shift. This means that those in Christian Ministry have no choice but to engage/wrestle with it (if they actually want to minister to the emergent generation, that is). Perhaps what was even more surprising how Tickle's book gave a name to my oppositional behavior in college, the fights with the university chaplain, the uncomfortable conversations with my parents (uncomfortable for them anyways). While it could be argued that my personal tacking of emergent issues was caused or at least kick-started by my formal exposure to it, but I believe a huge part of it was that I was organically part of the struggle. I am a part of the emergent generation and understanding of faith is inherently different from that of my parents, even if I do still call myself and evangelical.

Youth today are even more attached to this emergence, which is why ignoring or viscously opposing it is just not a viable option for today's youth worker. The need to oppose the popular views of science to defend God's sovereignty will absolutely baffle and "turn off" many students. This does not mean that Christianity has nothing to offer this generation, indeed the Emergence is a movement proving that is not the case. Young people wrestling with the emergence will resonate with Christ the center, the unity of the body of Christ and the greatest commandments. Though we cannot ignore or attack the great Emergence we can engage it with our youth without encouraging them to blindly follow suit. Still, engagement is the only option.

An Orthodox Prayer for One’s Enemies

⁴³ "You have heard the law that says, 'Love your neighbor'
and hate your enemy.⁴⁴ But I say, love your enemies!
Pray for those who persecute you!" Matt 5:43-44

Lord,

Today marks the anniversary of a truly tragic event and it should be remembered as such. It should not, however be used as fuel for hatred. We must confess that we are often guilty of the same anger, hatred and fear that created this awful act.

Please accept this feeble attempt to take a break from the hate to love as You would have us love. We may not fully mean it in our hearts, but we take this time to pray for the sect of people who were a part of or were in support of this heinous act. We ask that you would reveal Yourself and Your good news to them and remove strong the hatred and fear that is in there hearts. We ask that you would show them the same mercy that we would have you offers us. We confess that there may be some validity to the anger they have towards our nation.

We do not know how it is possible to love our enemies, but also don't know how it is possible for a perfect God to love us, a group of sinners so we will continue to try. We recognize that in order for "Your kingdom come and Your will be done on earth like it is in heaven" love and mercy must replace hatred and fear. So we ask that you would transform are hearts. In the mean time Lord, we ask that Your love and mercy would shine on both us and our enemies.

In name of Jesus, the beacon of your Love and Mercy,

Amen