Gained Perspective: Helping the Young Samuels of the World

⁸ A third time the LORD called, “Samuel!” And Samuel got up and went to Eli and said, “Here I am; you called me.” Then Eli realized that the LORD was calling the boy. ⁹ So Eli told Samuel, “Go and lie down, and if he calls you, say, ‘Speak, LORD, for your servant is listening.’” So Samuel went and lay down in his place. – 1 Samuel 3: 8 and 9

Young Samuel, like so many of the young people that we encounter on a daily basis lacked perspective.  He did not have the previous experience to know what was going on.  It was up to Eli to give Samuel the perspective he needed, and once he did, some amazing things happened!  Adults can play the role of Eli by:

1)      Listening instead of Dismissing

At first Eli didn’t really know what was going on and without knowing what was really going on in Samuel’s life he dismissed Samuel’s experience, telling him to go back to sleep.  It wasn’t until Eli knew what was going on, until he truly listened to Samuel’s sharing of his experience that he was able to give helpful and authentic instruction.  I believe there is a subtle difference between lecturing and faithful instruction, and the difference is authentic listening. 

2)      Asking Questions instead of Lecturing

I can’t help but wonder how much faster Eli would have figured things out if he had asked a question or two before dismissing Samuel.  Asking questions is a great way to get us in the right mindset to really listen to young people.  In addition, asking questions, unlike lecturing, can be effective way to steer young people in the right direction.  Powell and Clark (2011) rightly point out, “Parents lecturing kids hasn’t worked…Picture you and your child talking about premarital sex.  Does your child know what you think about it?  Does your child know what you would want to say about it?  Odds are good that the answer to both is yes” (77-78).   Our communication with children needs to help them come to their own understanding of what Christ would have them do, not force our views down their throats.  

3)      Sharing Personal Faith Stories

Samuel had never heard the LORD speak before.  It was something that Eli had encountered prevously.  Eli’s past experience allowed him to interpret what was going on in Samuel’s life.  Young people today still need the experience of others to interpret what is going on in their own lives.  This is especially true during times of doubt, and during times when young people feel that God has let them down.  We tend to doubt God’s faithfulness when we lose sight of how He has been faithful in the past.  Sharing the stories of the bible is an obvious and powerful way to remind young people of God’s faithfulness, but it is equally important for young people to hear personal stories of God’s faithfulness from the adults around them.  Sadly, most young people have never heard the salvation stories and other personal stories of God’s faithfulness from parents and other caring adults. 

Adults are right to believe that young people need their wisdom to gain perspective.  The problem is, adults tend to go about sharing that wisdom the wrong way.  By listening instead of dismissing, asking questions instead of lecturing, and sharing their personal faith stories adults can help young people gain perspective about how God is working in their lives, just as Eli helped young Samuel realize his call to follow God. 

Powell, K.E. & Clark, C. (2011). Sticky faith. Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan.